Mention to most people that you bought a wedding dress second-hand, and they think Corpse Bride Halloween costumes. Not me. At 20, I went shopping with my mother in several second-hand shops and found a wedding dress I liked. It fit without alterations. It helps not to be superstitious about such things. A friend one-upped me in practicality, buying a cocktail party dress in her favourite primary colours in a shimmery material. She had her bridesmaids choose single pastel colour dresses they could enjoy again. My friend relived her precious wedding day memories whenever she wore her dress for other occasions.
Doing what you love does map out your path to fulfillment
In my forties, I renewed my devotion to living for less and cutting out extraneous expenses when I switched from office work to full-time writing and editing. Cutting those extras meant more freedom to explore my true passions. When you do what you love, you never work a day in your life. Having the time to relax also invited my muse to find me in the quieter moments.
Granted, when you think about living on less to create more time for following your dreams, bargain wedding attire is a one-time saving –– usually. Make changes by looking at little things or daily treats that add up. Brides may want to spend $1,531—the average cost of a wedding dress. On that same Google search list, there were options for bridal wear under $500. A TLC channel program called Say Yes to the Dress flaunts dresses easily equivalent to a house down payment. There are always choices.
Buying stuff doesn’t pave the road to happiness
About those daily treats. A Starbucks Caffè Mocha Grande costs $4.15. The average Canadian hourly earnings (take-home pay) is $19.62-$28.94. If you indulge in a Starbucks treat every working day, that is three-and-a-half to five hours per month of life energy you have depleted for the treat. You may decide it is worth every penny. Full transparency: I don’t drink coffee. I am a writer, so pens and journals are my weakness. We all choose what we spend our life energy on… or do we? Amazon algorithms, Siri, and Alexa are listening and tempting us. I admit I have longingly looked at some of Amazon’s spot-on suggestions, then given my head a shake.
Look at your surroundings. Has your stuff nurtured you, or does dusting, caring, and maintaining those objects soon void their initial satisfaction and drain you? Many studies inform how people become addicted to and distracted by the fleeting dopamine hits of buying something. Not only that, but visual clutter is also an energy vampire interfering with our rest, creative centres, and ability to be in the moment.
About that stuff in your space. Ask yourself if clutter owns you. Peter Walsh, in his book It’s All Too Much, says, “There’s a stuff epidemic,” and Buddha wisely said, “Desire [of the material world] is the root of all suffering.”
It may surprise many people to calculate suffering and contentment in relation to stuff. Now ponder how well Amazon has done during the pandemic. According to Wikipedia, their profits soared 200 percent and the online sales giant hopes pandemic habits will stick. In fact, Amazon’s profits recently tripled.
The more we spend, the more life energy we must expend. While I can suggest making your coffee at home for a fraction of the price, I am looking for a coach to keep me away from Staples. Track your spending for one month and see where you can cut back. We can all buy time to relax by leaving our wallets at home.
Links: Peter Walsh, It’s All Too Much
The TLC channel program Say Yes to the Dress
Learn more about Rusti:
Rusti L Lehay, a global editor and book and writing coach, created over 60 articles guiding writers to authordom. Witnessing writers find and speak in their own voice to serve the real boss, the audience, not the editor, is one of Rusti’s greatest joys. She offers bi-monthly online writing STAY-Treats and monthly lounges and teaches weekly creative writing classes. Her primary mission is to inspire, provide value and make writing fun and easy.
Links: https://msha.ke/rustilehay.info/
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I just can't stop thinking about the episode on Queer Eye when Karamo kept saying, 'Love is in the details'. It's sooooooo true!
The little stuff really does matter, because it's the little stuff that ultimately makes up all the big stuff.
As a Leadership/Success coach, I'm privileged to coach young leaders how to really ignite their confidence and leadership in order to excel at what they are chasing. A big part of what I do is take my clients back, way back to when they use to 'dream'....remember those days?
I’m living my dream, and boldly putting myself ‘out there’ by adding another leg to my company, Interior Styling.
When we add beautiful details to our space, to our homes, to our writing, to our businesses, to our relationships, everything just seems to be enriched. There's just more love.
Let's look at your space. Do you have some photos that take you back to an amazing trip, or photos of people you adore? Start thinking about creating a gallery wall. Gather up things you love. Add some green to your space, it's a simple as buying a few stems from your local florist. How about books? Books can tell a million stories, and really help define your style and how you roll. Adding quotes that inspire you, add art that makes you feel good.
Those are just a few ideas. For me, I have shells all around my home. They remind me of my mum. I've collected shells from all parts of the world, starting from when I was very young. I treasure this.
Many people say to me, 'I have no idea what my style is, I'm not good at this Katy!' Here's a tip, start with what you don't like. Crazy thought right? But once you know what isn't in alignment, or doesn't make you sing, then you can really start to creating with a blank canvas, but a clear canvas.
Creating a style is cool. It is empowering and can tell your guests/friends a story about who you are.
As much as we work on the inside stuff (Success Coaching) it's equally as important to have an inspiring space, a space that we can be proud of. So, the outside stuff requires attention too. Trust me on this one.
Think about your style. Think about what you love, and what brings you happiness and joy. Love is in the details.
xo
K
Katy Loewen
Home Stylist/Success Coach
https://www.instagram.com/katyloewenco/
https://www.instagram.com/katyloewenstyling/
Do you have a collection of fine china hidden away in a cupboard or in a box in the basement collecting dust? Are you waiting for that special day to break it all out but are not sure when that day is coming?
Back in the day...
I never understood growing up why we could never step foot in the living room unless company was coming over. Or why we saved using the crystal stemware we got from Birks and the Royal Doulton China for special occasions like Christmas or Thanksgiving.
For the better part of the year, our living room and dining room would remain in pristine shape looking as if it had freshly been vacuumed with the lines of the vacuum cleaner head still imprinted on the carpet. And God forbid if anyone of us went in there and made any footprints! I remember thinking this was a bit unusual but hey, adults had all sorts of rules and notions that I couldn't begin to figure out so why sweat it. I had bigger fish to fry like going outside to build a fort or play hide and seek with the neighbourhood kids until my Mom called me home for supper.
What to do with "the stuff"
A few years ago, my siblings and I downsized my Mom from a 4 bedroom house to an apartment style condo. Those were probably the most productive10 days in my entire life! In my Mom's generation, success was all about owning your home and filling up every nook and cranny with valuable trinkets and things. I remember my Mom getting frequent offerings from the Bradford Exchange for figurines, plates, coins and various keepsakes of which she often took them up on.
Obviously my Mom couldn't take it all with her, so my brother and sisters came over and we determined which items each of us wanted out of all the beautiful things she had collected over a lifetime.
My sisters and I split up my Mom's tea cups that she had received from various relatives including her Mom. When I came home, I vowed that they were not going to be put away in a china cabinet to collect dust, which by the way, isn't even possible because I don't own a china cabinet and don't even have a dining room to put it in! What I did decide though, was that I was going to USE them.
Appreciate the good things in life!
Life has changed a lot since growing up and it's time to change along with it.
When I have girlfriends over or if I'm coaching a client, I bring out the china tea cups on my red tray and we enjoy the whole experience; the warm tea, the beautiful cups and the connection with one another. It brings me so much joy to see how special everyone feels, including me, drinking from my lovely tea cups!
What are we waiting for? Each and every moment is special if we decide to make it that way.
Life is short; use your Grandma's tea cups!
Let’s face it, the Holiday Season can be a crazy, cluttered and overwhelming. The secret to thriving through it all is to have a plan and a budget. So when January comes and the bills start rolling in, you’re not starting off the New Year on the wrong foot.
Find out the gifts that people want. It’s will save you time in the end and you won’t be running around returning things in January.
Have you ever had this happen; it’s Christmas morning and there’s a whole bunch of gifts under the tree, and everyone is rifling through one gift after another like it’s a race? Just when you think the children are going to settle in and play for hours, they run off and play with all their old stuff, and all the new gifts are left piled up in the corner?
`The point is, less-is-more when gift giving. Wouldn’t you rather get that special person one thing they really want versus a whole bunch of things that maybe they don’t?
A lot of the time we get caught up with the season and end up spending way too much money. When we don’t have a plan and we don’t stick to a budget, January ends up being kind of a downer, because we have still have to pay for everything we have purchased on our credit cards. Set a budget per person that is reasonable for your pocketbook.
Here is an excellent strategy that a friend shared on social media that I love that keeps gift-giving in perspective and reduces overspending and overwhelm. Plus, it rhymes so it’s easy to remember!
Something you want
Something you need
Something to wear
Something to read
Take it up a notch and consider giving clutter-free gifts. Here are a few ideas to consider:
Lessons
Great for all ages. It could be lessons to learn to play the guitar or the piano. Perhaps attending some kind of class.
Events
There are always lots of music concerts and events. It could be a sports event or a play. Maybe it’s something you can do together. This is always a great option for teenagers; attending their favourite band's concert.
Memberships
This could be a punch card at a gym, a zoo pass or a membership to a theme park if you have one. There are also self-care splurges like a massage, a manicure or pedicure. The latest rage is a hot shave for men which you can get at most hair salons. And who doesn’t want their card detailed; another awesome idea.
Edibles
There are so many specialty food shops that specialize in high-end olive oils and balsamic vinegar pairings. A great alternative to a bottle of wine when invited to someone’s home during the holidays.
Gift Card
A gift cards to your loved one’s favourite place is a sure bet. Especially for teenagers. Whether for food, apparel, books or music, gift cards are always a hit.
Do-it-yourself Gifts
There is nothing quite as thoughtful as a home-made gift. It could be as simple as a gift certificate booklet you create with experiences for your loved one like a massage, foot bath, movie night, dinner out, dinner in which you make, mowing the lawn/shovelling snow, or just about anything that they enjoy but don’t often treat themselves to.
There are so many options for do-it-yourself gifts; check out Pinterest for some inspiration.
When you have a plan and a budget for your gift giving, you can avoid waking up in the New Year with too much stuff, nowhere to put it and mounting credit card bills. That is stressful and with some planning and attention can be avoided.
Enjoy the holiday season. Remember less-is-more when gift giving and that it’s not about the stuff; it’s about the moments. And hey, the greatest present you can give this Holiday Season is your presence so let yourself off the hook.
Happy Holidays!
Leigh Ann makes her home with her family in the Canadian Rocky Mountains where they enjoy a life of balance, simplicity and adventure. Best known as an Intuitive Change-maker and Abundance Coach, Leigh Ann helps women declutter their life on a physical, mental and spiritual level.
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