Writer’s block is a real thing. I suffer from it frequently, and I have 20 years of experience as a professional writer. Fortunately, though, there are ways around it.
If, despite your best intentions, you struggle to get your thoughts down in writing, I invite you to consider three barriers that may be standing in your way.
A topic pops into your head and you’re about to start writing when your inner critic jumps in with, “that’s been done before,” and you’re probably right. Pretty much every idea in the universe has been covered before – but not by you, and that’s what matters.
Your prospects aren’t simply people who need your services. They’re people who need your services and resonate with you as a human being.
Your packaging is what makes you unique; your language, your opinions, your insights. So own them and delve into a topic, even if it’s been covered 150,000 times before. If anything, a topic’s popularity proves there’s an audience eager to receive a fresh perspective on that very subject.
Raise your hand if you’re a perfectionist? (Thanks. You can lower your hand now.)
When I’m writing for my clients, I labour over every sentence I write because I’m being paid to deliver high-quality work. It’s my job to deliver an A+.
As a blogger, though, I aim for a B-. Why? Because my goal isn’t to win people over with my writing skills, and neither is yours. Your goal is to demonstrate your expertise while building or strengthening your rapport with people who matter.
So, follow a few best-practices, like keeping paragraphs short and proofreading your work (always), and trust that if you miss a comma here or there, nobody’s scrutinizing you because they’re not interested in your writing skills; they’re interested in your content.
If any of the above resonated with you, this may sound familiar.
You sit down at your desk, straighten up your keyboard, take a deep breath, and prepare to write. A few seconds later, you realize you haven’t eaten lunch so you stand up and head to the kitchen.
Or perhaps you think about writing a post but hey, you have a business to run, which means you have calls to make, invoices to issue, courses to take, and networking events to attend.
I get it, but here’s the thing: if you really want to write, you need to commit to the goal of writing and hold yourself accountable to that commitment. If that means setting aside an hour a week and publishing one article a month, then do it.
Commit to that hour. Put it in your calendar and show up for it as you would if you were giving that hour to a valuable client. Alternatively, join our co-writing community. We meet for two hours every second Friday and we get some serious blogging done.
Perhaps I’ll see you there!
Viv
Viv Singer is a Toronto-based freelance copywriter with 20+ years of experience helping solopreneurs and businesses of all kinds and sizes express themselves through the written word. Whether she’s writing newsletters, websites, announcements, advertisements, blog posts, or social content, she’s passionate about crafting words that capture the attention of their audiences and compel the right readers to read on.
Check out Viv’s professional copywriting portfolio, explore her personal blog, or email her to learn more about her copywriting services.
I wonder if you can relate to this - I spent a huge chunk of my life thinking there was something wrong with me.
It just seemed like I was just never enough - never smart enough, talented enough, pretty enough, successful enough, - I wasn’t enough in any area of my life.
And so I decided to go on a journey of “fixing myself.” I took classes, read books, took trainings, I practiced my craft over and over again until I got more than just good at it, I bought more expensive clothes and drove an hour to get my hair done at the best place - the things I did to try to be 'more' was just a never-ending list of to-dos!
But I had consoled myself with the fact that I at least had hope: I had this promise that if I stayed on the treadmill of self-improvement I would get to where I felt I needed to be!
But year after year I never reached that promised land and year after year I found new areas I needed to improve (hello motherhood) and new methods that I still needed to try.
And then one day I picked up a book about acceptance...not just any kind of acceptance….Radical Acceptance...and I thought well maybe I should give this a try!
And I have to be honest, I laughed through most of the first chapter - I can remember thinking - "Well this won't work! I would never do anything if I just sat and accepted myself for who I am!"
But there was a tug on the heart that made me keep reading - And I am so grateful that I did, because it turns out I had NO IDEA what Acceptance actually was!
I thought it meant giving up and giving in...a type of "It is what it is."
But Radical Acceptance is oh so different than that!
Radical acceptance has two parts:
The first part is the ability to really see what is in front of us. We might think that we have a good idea of what is happening in front of us but the truth is most of us look at the superficial circumstances and create some story about what we think is happening.
We see someone who is angry and we see someone who is out of control instead of seeing someone who is hurt. We see someone who is procrastinating and we see someone who has no drive rather than someone who is dealing with the burden of perfection.
We almost never see what really is, unless we pause and take a moment, and in that moment accept what is in front of us so that we can see clearly.
Most of the time we resist and reject what is in front of us. We see an angry person and we say "You shouldn’t be angry." We see someone who is procrastinating and we say "You should come up with a greater why."
And in saying what 'should be' we reject what is.
The second part of Radical Acceptance is to feel compassion for what we see. Normally when we look at something on the superficial level we tend to put it in the box of right or wrong - and we don’t normally feel much compassion for the things that go in the 'it's wrong' box!
But when we see what really is we can also see the pain behind the things we label wrong and when we see pain it inspires us to compassion!
And here is the good news - when we have seen what is really there and when we have felt compassion for what we see we come to a beautiful place - we come to a place where we are connected to our higher self and where we are connected to our resourcefulness and to our creativity.
Too often we see, we reject and we jump into action. And then we don’t understand why the solutions don’t bring us the joy they promised or why we still feel upset after things have technically been worked out.
We jump into action too quickly and don’t take the time to process the emotions that we are experiencing.
The truth is we are actually only ready to take action after we have practiced radical acceptance!!
Only after we truly see and find our compassion are we ready for any type of action! If we dive into action before we truly see and find our compassion we tend to react instead of act and I don't know about you but when I am reacting I am never at my best self!
So amazingly enough when I practiced Radical Acceptance in my life the quote from Carl Rogers came true when he said "The curious paradox is that when I accept myself as I am, then I change."
Are you curious about Radical Acceptance and how it would impact your life? Listen for more on The Art of Being H(You)man Podcast
Meg is a life coach, Hypnotherapist, blogger and event host that is passionate about walking with people who want more out of life than just the status quo!
She believes that life doesn’t have to work out exactly the way we think it “should” in order to be enjoyed and that people don’t have to be perfect in order to be loved.
She believes that we all have the voice of truth inside of us but sometimes it can be hard to hear. And most importantly that we must live between the tension of accepting the things we cannot change and taking massive action on the things we can!
Meg creates spaces where women can slow down and process all the things that are influencing and controlling their lives - their everyday thoughts, emotions, and the stories they have been telling themselves.
Spaces where they can look at their inner world, gain valuable insight and then reclaim their personal authority, and make conscious decisions that transform the way they experience their lives!
Through one on one coaching, group coaching and workshops Meg helps women show up in the world with more love, and less ego, more compassion, and less judgment, more vulnerability, and less shame, more emotional agility and less fear!
Meg is also the current Branch Director of South Surrey/White Rock for Happy Healthy women.
Meg lives in BC with her husband of 20 years, two teenage boys and their little dog Charlie. To learn more about Meg and her business, visit her website www.megheppner.com
"Ding Ding!"
There it is. That reminder you set in your phone to workout! It's time!
But wait - you're still in bed, or in the thick of work at your computer. Your runners are under a pile of other shoes, and you're dreading that same YouTube workout you've already done a few times.
You hear that voice. The one that whispers: "skip today", and you respond: "I should. I've gotta get through all of these emails and I just don't have the time. Who was I kidding setting that alarm?"
Then you press delete on the notification...you've decided you're just not the workout kind of person - and then the whole guilt - action - inaction - guilt - action - inaction cycle starts again.
𝗜 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗰𝘆𝗰𝗹𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲, 𝟮𝟱 𝘆𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘀. 𝗔𝗻𝘆𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗲𝗹𝘀𝗲?
The thing is, I really wanted to be a person who loved fitness, and the biggest things that made that happen for me, had nothing to do with setting alarms.
Here are three things that helped me get to that place and I know they'll help you too.
𝟭. 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗪𝗛𝗬 - Are you working out to have a six pack, lose the baby weight and have a "bikini body"? Or are you working out to feel strong, live healthy and be in a good mental state?
The first few reasons are based on your perception on what others think of you. The others are about what YOU think of you. It's the latter that will keep you inspired to keep moving.
𝟮. 𝗜𝗻𝘃𝗲𝘀𝘁 - Time and Money. Yes. If you looked at the hours and coin you dropped on something that IS successful in your life, I bet it wouldn't be a "when I have the time and/or money" situation.
As tempting as it is - wellness is not a thing you want to cheap out on. At the beginning of my journey - I joined a boutique fitness studio to get me on the right track. It was the most I had ever spent on my fitness, but it kept me accountable.
I knew that the regular membership type deal that I had done so many times before, wasn't enough to keep me in the zone. I needed more.
𝟯. 𝗔𝗱𝗼𝗽𝘁 𝗮 𝗟𝗶𝗳𝗲𝘀𝘁𝘆𝗹𝗲 - Shift your mindset away from temporary fixes and toward lifestyle changes. Repeat after me: "I am a person that loves fitness, wellness and nutrition."
One small choice and habit at a time will get you closer to the lifestyle, state of mind and the wellness you envision.
When I coach people through my wellness program, we look at all sides. Nutrition, mindset and fitness. It's important to know that it's not just action that creates change. It's action fueled by emotion, feeling and passion. What is the life you want to be living? Let's focus on that.
Connect with me here if you'd like to explore this for yourself.
In Happiness & Health,
Natalie Colalillo
Founder & CEO Happy Healthy Women
Instagram: @happy_healthy_nat
One day a number of years back I was out for a walk and I happened to catch my reflection in the window of a store … it stopped me dead in my tracks! My 1st thought was “holy SH*T! How did you walk out of the house looking like that? You look awful! That top makes you look gigantic! And seriously…what’s up with your hair?” And the dialogue in my head went on and on.
I bet this has happened to you too. Why do we speak so unkindly to ourselves? Why do we, dare I say it, always feel that our bodies are not good enough? What if I told you that there’s ways to be a little kinder? Would you be willing to give it a go? Let’s talk about the 5 top ways we are unkind to our bodies and how we can put a stop to that NOW!!
Comparing – Cruel to Kind
Look at her! I’ll never have a body/hair/eyes like hers! We do this all the time…we compare ourselves to other people…especially if we are on a weight-loss journey. There is a big difference between admiring another person and comparing yourself to them. Think about the beautiful models you see on the front of a magazine...think about your favourite athlete; it’s their JOB to look like that! It’s our job to admire them not be them.
When we compare ourselves to others, we automatically set ourselves up for disappointment. The next time you find yourself comparing, try Reframing your thought. That might sound like “Look at her! I might never be a super-model but boy do I have gorgeous eyes!” Reframing allows us to look upon our thoughts with a more positive and gentler attitude.
Deprivation and Binging – to eat or not to eat? That is the Question!
Perhaps the most unkind thing we can do to our bodies when we are on our healthy living journey is to not fuel our bodies with good and balanced nutrition. It has been proven over and over again that diets don’t work! Let me say that again a little louder! DIETS DON’T WORK! No matter where you are on your journey you must always approach your nutrition from a place of kindness. You can not be kind to your body if you are depriving it of food or if you are consistently over-indulging.
Get rid of the diet plans! Throw out the diet books masquerading as cook books! Cancel your memberships from diet loss programs! Honestly all you need to do to be kind to your body is to eat the best fresh foods your budget can afford. You need Power Foods and Pleasure Foods in your diet (More on that next week!). You need to eat when you’re hungry (see my next post where we talk about the mind/hunger connection and how to determine where you are on the hunger scale!). You need to hydrate with fresh water. When you follow these simple guidelines there will be no need to neither deprive nor binge. You will feel great and your body will thank you!
But I Hate Running/Yoga/Aerobics – Be More Like Monica From Friends
Have you seen the episode of Friends where Monica is taking a tap-dancing class? She’s super bad at it (kind of like me in a Zumba class!) and the teacher calls her out in front of the whole class telling her she’s doing it all wrong. Her response to the teacher is “Yah but at least I’m doing it!”.
This is a perfect example of what it means to be kind to yourself/body when you exercise. We all know how important it is to move our bodies. Exercise keeps us healthy not only physically but mentally as well. So if this is a necessary part of our day, why would you want to do something that you don’t enjoy?
Sometimes we get caught up in the “I don’t have time to exercise” dialogue with ourselves. My motto has always been it’s the Quality not the Quantity! If you find yourself not wanting to start an exercise session because of this, remember that even 10 or 15 minutes of an exercise you actually enjoy is far better than no exercise at all! Keep that body moving and it will thank you!
Being kind to your body is never an all or nothing thing! It takes work and time! Don’t expect it to happen overnight and don’t expect it to be perfect every single day. You’ll have days that the first thought you have is more on the negative side of things; that’s ok! When you notice that, go back to the Reframing exercise we talked about earlier. Or if perhaps you’ve over-indulged on the Pleasure foods today, maybe tomorrow you decide to be a little kinder to your body and fuel yourself with lots of Power foods. I invite you to share how you are practicing Body Kindness this week. Pop over to the Perfectly Imperfect Mastermind Group on FB and share your successes!
Anne Caissie
Life Metamorphosis Coach
Branch Director, Happy Healthy Women - Guelph
Facilitator, Women’s Wellness Circle – Guelph
How much attention do you pay to your emotional life? Do you actively tend to your emotional wellness, or are your feelings more of an inconvenient or inconsequential afterthought?
Emotional wellness truly does impact all areas of our lives - including our happiness, health and success. So in case you haven’t paid much attention to your feelings or learned much about them before now, here’s an intro to emotional wellness and why our feelings matter.
What is emotional wellness?
Having a healthy emotional life is a lifelong practice. It is noticing, feeling, understanding and honouring ALL of your feelings. So not just your “positive” feelings (which of course we prefer, and want to experience as often as possible), but also our “negative” feelings which are immensely important too. Together, all of our emotions help us effectively manage the inevitable ups and downs of life. They all serve a purpose in a healthy human experience.
Emotional health is one of the four essential aspects of whole wellness. It’s interconnected with the other aspects: physical, mental and spiritual health. And often, emotional health is the missing piece of the wellness puzzle that makes all the difference.
Why do feelings matter?
With the knowledge that feelings are an integral part of yourself, you may wonder why they’re worthy of your loving attention. For starters, their evolutionary purpose keeps us safe, smart and ensures our survival. Hooray for that! But you may be even more interested in how else feelings impact your modern daily life at a practical level.
In his book “Permission to Feel”, Marc Brackett, the director of Yale Centre for Emotional Intelligence, offers these specific benefits of emotional wellness. Here are five areas in our everyday lives where feelings are most influential.
Our feelings matter most because . . .
And if all of that isn’t enough incentive, remember the secondary benefits that your emotional wellness have on all areas of your life. When you are well, you are well equipped to effectively navigate all the other areas in your life for the better. Let’s use business as an example.
When YOU are the greatest asset of your business, your emotional health is essential to your business’ success.
So which of these benefits is the most inspiring reason for you to nurture your emotional wellness? Let us know in the comments below.
And remember that you matter, so your feelings matter too. Follow your heart to the results that matter most to you!
Nicole Moorey coaches women entrepreneurs to consistently prioritize their own self-care needs and emotional wellness, so they can give their best to themselves and their businesses.
She’s pleased to lead HHW Thunder Bay as Branch Director: Facebook
Benefits of meditation are many: better concentration and mood management, relaxation leading to better sleep, improved mental health and immunity, lower blood pressure, and on and on the list goes.
Each one of these benefits is helpful in the life of any human, but what if you’re not quite like any other human? What if you want more? What if you’re an entrepreneur? Can you get more bang for your buck from meditation?
YES, yes you can!
Breath, mantra, mudra, and intention are all the elements of meditation. Let me explain each one, and how it can support a busy person who wishes prosperity and business success:
But guess what’s the most effective? If you combine all of these elements and extend the mudra to your entire body, you get a practice that is stunningly powerful! With that practice we can demolish the blocks (physical, mental, emotional) that are standing in our way to prosperity and abundance.
Last year, a few weeks after going into the first lockdown, I succumbed to the wave of panic and confusion, as many small business owners did. I recognized that I needed to pivot, but I wasn’t clear on how exactly, so I started doing this practice. Pretty shortly after that, a new way to serve in my business clarified, I was able to continue with a new sense of purpose, drive and optimism, and a new source of income.
Do you want in? Join me for a 40-day group practice of Param Karam Dharam kriya - a moving meditation that will help you align with the flow of prosperity. You will discover new openings for growth and abundance in places that were previously unavailable to you. You will make shifts effortlessly, as you practice with the flow of energy, and that flow will carry you through your life and business. Awaken to new possibilities!
Spring is in the air. Can you feel it? After a long winter, are you ready for a fresh new season? And are you just as ready for some fresh new self-care ideas?
If you struggle to consistently take good care of yourself and your wellness needs, you’re going to love this simple seasonal approach.
By tuning into the infinite wisdom of spring, you can then apply those insights in a practical way to your own daily self-care. Since we as humans are nature too, we thrive when we can work with and not against the natural energy and rhythms of the seasons. Here’s how . . .
1) Notice the season around you.
What do you sense and feel on a typical spring day where you live? I picture fresh starts and stepping out, cleansing rains, invigorating winds and warm sunshine, all leading to buds, sprouts and blossoms. It’s a season of action, attending and adventure.
Once you understand spring’s vibe, you can reflect on what this specifically means for you and your self-care:
How could I incorporate more of the parts of spring that I most enjoy into my self-care practice?
How could I consider the parts of spring that I least enjoy to adapt my self-care practice?
2) Notice the season within you.
Now that you know what spring energy means to you, do your inner thoughts and feelings match? Or are there areas in your life where you’re just not feeling the spring vibe? Perhaps you’d rather rest like winter, savour like summer or finalize details like fall. Just because it’s spring outside, it doesn’t mean you’re necessarily up for new beginnings and blossoming in all areas of your life.
Awareness of your inner metaphorical season can help you have more compassion for yourself and customize your self-care to truly meet your needs:
In what one area of my life am I experiencing spring energy? How can I nurture that energy in my self-care?
In what one area of my life am I not experiencing spring energy? How can I nurture that alternate energy in my self-care?
3) Nurture your needs with ONE self-care practice.
Having reflected on your literal and metaphorical seasons, you’re now in an excellent place to choose ONE self-care practice to try. Don’t overthink it. Just go with the one that feels right, that energizes or soothes you, that feels like home.
And try it today! The best self-care is the self-care that actually happens, so by keeping it simple and starting right away you increase your chance of success.
By noticing the natural rhythm of the season around you and noting how that relates to the season within you, you have incredible insights on how to best nurture your unique needs. Your self-care will spring to life!
Nicole Moorey coaches women to consistently prioritize themselves and their own wellness needs, so they can give their best to themselves, their businesses and their loved ones: nicolemoorey.com
She’s pleased to lead HHW Thunder Bay as Branch Director: Facebook
The Great Mother Archetype holds one of the most powerful energies in the world - the power of feminine energy!
We see it when we look at Gaia the Greek Goddess who created the world out of void and mass and darkness.
We see it in Isis the Egyptian Goddess whose ability to heal could bring the dead back to life. We see it in Sophia the Goddess of Wisdom who showed people the best way of living by connecting them to their higher selves.
We see it in the Virgin Mary as she protects and nurtures the Son of God.
As human beings we all have a deep connection to the Great Mother Archetype and the incredible energy that she holds because we have all been the recipients of her great gifts.
We come into this world vulnerable, weak, and in need, and without the nurturing and life-sustaining energy that the Great Mother brings into the world none of us would have survived!
For some of us this energy came in the form of a traditional mother, but for others it came in the form of grandma's, aunties, sisters, nannies, babysitters, or even in some cases the men in our lives.
This life force offers us:
Nurture
Support
Intuition
Creativity
Wisdom
Persistence
The list goes on and on!
But there are four beautiful gifts that Great Archetype offers us that I think are really worth highlighting!
So many of us have been taught that competition is the only way to have success. That in order for one of us to win than others must lose - and this has created a world that is unkind, unforgiving, and in so many ways cruel.
But when we connect with the feminine energy that the Great Mother offers us we see that there is another way to live - That we can live in the spirit of collaboration and that it is the real 'secret' to success.
She offers us the idea that it is by working together that we move out of the mindset of scarcity and into the mindset of abundance - And from a mindset of abundance so much of what we thought was impossible becomes possible!
We live in a world that glorifies the mind and its ability to rationalize, analyze and justify. We all spend so much time living in our heads that we forget that our bodies are our first line of communication - that our bodies carry wisdom that goes beyond anything our minds can sort or understand.
Because we have all had the experience of walking into a room and getting a 'vibe' right? But so many of us, instead of listening to that vibe, begin the process of explaining that vibe away. And the results of that are often painful! We find ourselves in relationships that aren't good for us, partnerships that don't work, and in experiences that can take us years to process! But our Great Mother offers us another way to be - she encourages us to get in touch with our bodies, to listen to them, to use the sensations we feel as guides and as arrows that move us in the direction that is right for us!!
We are all giving birth to something - a family, a new friendship, a business, a technology, or an idea. And our Great Mother gives us the power to nurture and sustain these things.
One of the things that we are creating that we seldom think about is our inner voice! When we are not tapped into our feminine energy we tend to create a voice that is so critical and that focuses on tearing down not building up.
But when we connect to our feminine energy we create a voice that is kinder, that brings life, that tells us what is possible, and points out how very worthy we are.
It's a voice that heals us and when we share that voice with others it's a voice that can heal our communities and can heal the world we live in!
Taking a moment to reflect:
Now of course The Great Mother, in all her feminine glory has more than one side to her!
She is life-sustaining and nurturing and wise and creative.
But she also has another side.
We know that the Great Mother is best seen as Mother Nature and Mother Nature comes to us in seasons.
She brings us spring and summer - but she also brings us fall and winter.
And when she brings us fall and winter she comes to us as the Terrible Mother.
And even when she comes to us as the Terrible Mother she comes to us as a gift and baring gifts.
The Terrible Mother comes to us when things that we have held on to for too long need to die -when it is time to let go and to make room for what is new.
An amazing Goddess that exemplifies this is the Goddess Kali.
She is a fascinating Goddess with multiple arms and legs that wears a necklace of skulls and a skirt made of arms. And her whole purpose is simply to find things in the world whose time has come and to help them through the 'dying' process.
And we all have things in our life that need to die, don't we?
Old ideas
Old stories
Old belief systems
Relationships that harm us rather than serve us
Partnership and connections that are holding us back
And when we let these things go the seasons change again and the Terrible Mother transforms and becomes the Great Mother again bringing with her spring and summer, bringing with her new ideas to nurture, new relationships to enjoy, new adventures to embark on!
The power of the Great Mother/Terrible Mother and the incredible life-changing energy that she brings are available to us at any time and she is always ready to walk with you on your life journey!
If you are interested in learning more join us for an in-depth study of the book 'Women Who Run With The Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estes
https://www.meetup.com/Happy-Healthy-Women-SOUTH-SURREY-BC/events/wqtvcsyccfbhc/
Meg is a life coach, Hypnotherapist, blogger and event host that is passionate about walking with people who want more out of life than just the status quo!
She believes that life doesn’t have to work out exactly the way we think it “should” in order to be enjoyed and that people don’t have to be perfect in order to be loved.
She believes that we all have the voice of truth inside of us but sometimes it can be hard to hear. And most importantly that we must live between the tension of accepting the things we cannot change and taking massive action on the things we can!
Meg creates spaces where women can slow down and process all the things that are influencing and controlling their lives - their everyday thoughts, emotions, and the stories they have been telling themselves.
Spaces where they can look at their inner world, gain valuable insight and then reclaim their personal authority, and make conscious decisions that transform the way they experience their lives!
Through one on one coaching, group coaching and workshops Meg helps women show up in the world with more love, and less ego, more compassion, and less judgment, more vulnerability, and less shame, more emotional agility and less fear!
Meg is also the current Branch Director of South Surrey/White Rock for Happy Healthy women.
Meg lives in BC with her husband of 20 years, two teenage boys and their little dog Charlie.
To learn more about Meg and her business, visit her website www.megheppner.com
Did you know that the average woman spends 17 years of her life on a diet?
That doesn’t include the time that we spend worrying about how we look or telling ourselves that we aren’t good enough.
The past year has taught us life is too short. Things we take for granted can be what we end up deeply craving when they’re gone.
The fitness and beauty industry want us to believe that the answer is: we just have to work harder and spend more money.
It’s all crap.
The research is overwhelming: diets DO NOT work. According to the Council on Size & Weight Discrimination, 95% of diets fail and more than half gain back any lost weight within 1-5 years.
So, if diets don’t work - what does?
Embracing Joyful Movement
Re-think how you see exercise and its role in your life.
We need to stop believing that the reasons we need to exercise are to burn calories, justify what we ate or punish our bodies into a smaller size.
Ask yourself: what else does movement do for me? How does it improve my life? Why else does it feel good to move my body?
A few examples: It reduces my anxiety. It’s relieves stress, helps me sleep and have more energy!
Or, here is a radical one: I have fun while I am doing it.
Seek out movement you ENJOY even if it doesn’t look like traditional exercise. What did you like doing as a kid? Did you dance? Bike rides? Baseball? Use that as your inspiration.
Mindful Eating - Healing your relationship with food
We’ve been taught to ignore our hunger cues and use food for emotional comfort.
Here are some questions to discover your “food story”:
Write out your answers. Highlight any patterns, recurring thoughts, or statements that aren’t objectively true or anything that was “passed onto you” by someone else (or by society!).
Write a new story by incorporating mindfulness into your eating routine.
Mindful Eating is all about slowing down and learning how to listen to your internal cues of hunger and satiety.
Embrace mindful eating by:
With these small steps, you can connect with your body in a new way!
Replace shame, guilt and self-blame with honouring your body, celebrating what it can do, its abilities, and how you FEEL in your body - rather than how it looks.
You aren’t broken - diet culture is.
If you want to learn more, get FREE access to our Self Love Formula Webinar so you can learn more about how to stop self-sabotage and build your confidence.
Courtney McCarthy is an ACE certified group fitness instructor, Mindset Coach, and Founder of Loyobo FIT. Loyobo FIT stands for Love Your Body Fitness, which is a hybrid body positive fitness community that helps women to ditch diet culture and use fitness as a foundation for confidence in every aspect of their lives.
Courtney is happy to be a Happy Healthy Women Guelph, ON Trailblazer.
Can you handle reading another article on stress?
By now, we are all acutely aware how stress permeates our lives, especially in this pandemic-affected world.
Long-term stress damages the physical body, due to the increased inflammatory response, and it physically changes the brain as well.
Our “fuse” shortens, so we are prone to outbursts of anger. We see problems, not solutions. We become reactive to our environment and it can be difficult to take hold of our emotions.
But wait, did you know that stress is highly subjective? Two different people going through the same situation might react to the experience completely differently! For example, let’s take two people who are “stuck” in a thankless, low paying, draining job. One of those people might give in to feelings of victimhood, deduct that all jobs are the same, and continue working that job feeling trapped, stressed, and believe that they have no other options.
The other person might believe that they have control of the situation, and even though they are working a soul-sucking job at the moment, they know that they can and will find another job with a little bit of effort.
The degree of stress we perceive is highly dependent on our perceived degree of control we have over the situation. And the truth is, we always have some control over the situation.
Actually, let me rephrase that: you don’t control situations, the only thing you can control is you, and you can control you!
What’s that, you say? You can’t always control yourself? For example, when your kids are pushing all of your buttons, the house is a mess, lunches are not prepared, and you’re going to be late for your meeting, it’s difficult not to lose your sh*t, I get it!
It doesn’t have to be that way! Notice that way before your imminent blow up, certain thoughts start swirling through your head, your breath rate increases, your hands start shaking, you feel you're boiling inside, and then poof, you’re yelling at everyone, kids start crying, and now everything is a mess!
If that’s what you’re experiencing, congratulations, you have the awareness to change it! When you first notice the thoughts and the inner dialogue that you use to wind yourself up (yep, you are contributing to your blowup), shift your attention to your breath! Consciously try to slow it down, and shift from fast and shallow to slower and deeper. As your breath calms, your thoughts will calm. Breathe deeply and make those lunches!
Cultivating this kind of awareness is a practice, but once you start learning to rely on your breath to carry you through difficult moments, it becomes much easier.
I’ve been practicing Kundalini Yoga for 6.5 years, and teaching for 5, and in this practice we say: “Your mind follows the breath, your body follows your mind”. If you can control your mind, you can control your entire life! Simple, isn't it?
If you like the idea of mindful breathing and developing the habit of connecting with it, join me for a meditation! Not only will you learn how to regulate it, but also you’ll connect to your Divine nature! Please check out https://www.sevaramspronk.com/kundalini-meditation/ for more info, and join us for the reminder of our practice with a code LOVE111 for $5 off.
Let your breath sustain you!
With love,
SevaRam Spronk
SevaRam Spronk serves Happy Healthy Women as the Kitchener branch director. She is a level 2 KRI-certified Kundalini Yoga teacher (RYT-500), and she shares the life-saving tools of this technology with her community through on-line classes and workshops. In her life-coaching business she helps entrepreneurial women to destroy their self-perceived limitations to reach the next level of success.
Learn more about SevaRam and her business:
Website: sevaramspronk.com
What if the most limiting belief you can have is the belief “I have limiting beliefs.” 😊
Isn’t it interesting how it’s unlikely that we go around thinking, “I have non-limiting or freeing or expanding beliefs?”
Right?
Pause to think about this question for a moment.
Does it serve you or anyone else to think “limiting beliefs” is true?
It's more useful to believe that there are just thoughts that will drive you in one direction over another.
The reason why the brain might think that labeling certain sentences as limiting beliefs might be useful, is because it gives your brain something else to do.
Instead of doing the thing that feels uncomfortable and actually moves you in the direction of the success you want, it's easier for the brain to do what is familiar.
The so-called limiting beliefs turns into a fix-it project.
Naturally, this is when you’ll look for a good TEDTalk, scroll through Instagram or listen to a podcast.
Ha! I have been there, so I know the cycle well.
The brain might think that it’s useful to cover up these thoughts with positive thinking or reducing the shame by “trying not to think about it,” but what ends up happening is this pressure to be a certain way in order to feel better about yourself.
So when that doesn’t work, It’s completely common for the brain to turn to the bag of chips or maybe even to start obsessing over rearranging your office.
Getting caught in a spiraling pattern of “I’m still not done yet” is not a fun way to move through the day.
You and I both know that those thoughts are not who you truly are.
Here’s what you need to shift you out of this mindset.
You can decide to be in partnership with your brain, acknowledge that all thoughts are neutral and surrender the label limiting beliefs.
That way, you can still send out that email, complete that video or finish that one thing that you said you were going to do even when you have beliefs that make you feel uncomfortable.
When you know how to recognize and redirect the thoughts that spiral you into doubt and defeat, making big decisions and taking the leap to do something different feels effortless.
When you know how to focus on what’s most important, distractions become white noise and you experience results you want at a faster rate.
It is always easier than you think.
All it takes is your willingness to be in partnership with your brain.
Are you ready and willing?
. . . . . .
About Vanessa Leung
From SELF-DOUBT to SELF-MASTERY.
Through 1-1 life coaching, Vanessa Leung is able to help her clients master their fear and self-doubt. They learn to lead powerfully as their whole-hearted self by letting go of the people-pleasing perfectionism in a way that is self-loving.
In every session, Vanessa’s clients uncover a deeper trust in themselves to follow-through on their goals with ease. They make life-shifting decisions to propel them forward with confidence.
Her clients get to level up and experience a deeper connection in their work and loved ones. They have more time, freedom and presence to enjoy their life and business without the mind games.
There's only one skill you need to move forward with confidence. Are you ready to live in SELF-MASTERY?
When she’s not deep in creating new belief in her clients, you’ll find her out in the forest with her fur-love, Barley, or in the kitchen with her partner cooking up a storm.
Her power statement is I AM IN IT NOW.
www.8020livingco.com
As Human Beings we are master storytellers! We have been telling stories since the dawn of civilization - sharing our own or listening to each others!
It's through storytelling, that we keep track of all the overwhelming amount of things that happen to us in our lifetime.
It's how we make sense of the world around us and give meaning to the things that are important to us.
It's how we build our identity and begin to feel secure that we have 'know who we are'.
Our stories give coherence to our lives - without them, the human experience would feel very disjointed and confusing!
And importantly stories are how we predict the future! Since each story follows a trajectory we can make an educated guess as to how the story will end and that gives us an amazing sense of comfort and security!
Storytelling is a massive part of the human experience!!
When I look back in time at the stories I tell of how I met my husband, how my children were born, or how I came to live in the city I love so much they all fill me with so much warmth and joy - and I am sure that you have those types of stories too!
And as I think about the stories that I am currently living I can see how they help me feel comfortable in my future as they give me the opportunity to predict what will happen in the come years!
"Because I am this type of person doing this type of thing my future will be full of (fill in the blank)"
I am sure you have those current stories too!
But what about those stories that we carry around that are not so beneficial? Those stories that keep us connected to our pain, and our limiting beliefs?
Is there something we can do when we feel burdened down by stories that harm us instead of help us?
Yes! There is!!
(Don't worry girlfriend I won't leave you hanging!!)
The good news is that our stories are malleable - they are not set in stone! The facts of our stories may be - but the way we tell our stores are not.
Some of us have been telling ourselves the same stories for so long that we no longer recognize that our stories are embused with opinion, assumptions, and gaps. We think our stories are fact - but they're not!
And that is really really good news!!
If you have a story that is painful or that limits you that story is not written in ink - it can be rewritten - and even making small story edits can have a huge impact and change the way you feel, what you think is possible and the direction that you are headed!
But before we jump into how to do that let's talk about how a story gets created in the first place!
A story starts in such a simple way...it starts with a feeling.
Something happens in our lives and it causes us to respond with a feeling and we could just let it pass over us (since FYI most feelings don't last more than 20 to 30 seconds) but instead of doing that we do something that starts us on the path of storytelling.
As soon as we have a feeling we attach a thought to it - which then almost immediately we begin to justify, analyze, or rationalize, and so the storytelling begins!
And before you know it we have these elaborate stories that may or may not be the best representation of the facts.
And I don't know about you but I have definitely found myself all wrapped up in a story that has trapped me in a life I didn't want!
Thankfully we can break those stories down and rewrite them in a way that doesn't deny the facts or the pain, but still opens us up to love, healing and a possibility!
Becoming Aware Of Your Story:
Sometimes we have a story that is controlling us but we don't really have a clear picture of what that story is because we tell it in bits and pieces or because the story was formed so long ago that we are no longer fully aware of it. So becoming clear on exactly what our story is, is an important first step!
Finding The Facts In Your Story:
It's important to remember that our stories are normally full of assumptions, gaps and opinions. Removing them from the story and taking a look at just the bare naked facts can be both eye-opening and give you some room to breathe and sets the stage for looking at the story in a new way.
Understanding Your Story:
What are some facts that your story has been missing? What parts of the circumstances do you need to learn more about? If you take the time to question some of your assumptions what else could be true? What do you see if you look at your story from the perspective of the other people involved? From the perspective of people who love and care for you?
Learning From Your Story:
Our experiences in life are opportunities to grow into our higher selves. With this focus asked yourself what has this story taught you? How have you grown because of this story? In what ways are you a better person because of this experience? What can you feel gratitude for? On this flip side, how has this story limited you in ways you refuse to accept anymore?
Transforming Your Story:
Knowing that you are in control of the story you tell what is your new story now? What wisdom does this new story bring into your life? How can you now contribute to the world in a way that you felt incapable of before? What actions does this new story open up for me? What new ending can you anticipate because of this new story?
Our stories can be our greatest gifts and they can be the legacy that we pass on to the world of what humanity is capable of - enjoy writing your story, I can't wait to hear it!!
XOXO
Meg
